Last week was the first week since my lucky night, and we had fun, fun, fun. He would pick me up after school, take me out to dinner, or swimming, or just hang out on the porch and talking, playing music, laughing and everything else in between.
Everything was going Ok until the weekend, when Fillipe canceled two dates in a row. He didn’t take me to that party on Saturday night because he said he was out of town and he came home tired. Then he didn’t take me sailing on Sunday because he said it was too windy and it rained in the morning. I was turned down by him waking me up just to tell me that, but I still went to see him on Sunday night because he said he wanted to talk to me.
Then it happened, when he told me everything. He told me that he did go to see his wife on Saturday evening, but felt bad because he had me on his mind, and then when he came home he didn’t want to see me because she was on his mind, I think that’s why they had that big fight the other day.
Anyway, we had a long talk, and we talked about the situation we found ourselves in, and for a moment I felt that it was all my fault for falling in love so quickly and that it all happened just like litening, so fast, so strong all of a sudden, so I cried, and when a tear rolled down my cheek, he was trying so hard to make me smile by playing those songs he played when I first fell in love with him, so I gave him a flashing smile even though my feelings were hurt. He told me he didn’t mean to hurt my feelings, but it was obvious to me that he does love me, then why do this. What hurt me the most was that he didn’t tell me this last week, before we kissed, hugged and all that good stuff, and he told me it was because he didn’t realize it because he had that fight with his wife at the time and he felt lonely.
Before he walked me home he asked me if he could pick me up after school on Monday, but I told him it would be better if he picked me up on Tuesday because I needed some time too, just like him. In our situation, the decisions we have to make are not easy, they are hard and life-changing, that’s why we have to take it slow, but because of what happened yesterday I found out that deep in his heart he does love me and wants me to break up with my boyfriend, but is afraid to admit it because of his wife.
I am not afraid to admit that I love him, but the reason why I’m still with Steven is because I don’t really want to even think about what would happen to me after I break up with him. For so long I have been afraid to lose him and I told everyone about him, that I didn’t even imagine me being the one that would eventually leave him, it’s so difficult.
I was still crying a little bit before he brought me home, but my heart was a little bit calmer now, and it felt as if it was saying: “Time,time, what you need is time”, so I planned to spend some time at the busstop after school, and didn’t come to see him.
Today, just when my math class was suppose to start, Steven called me, and even though I didn’t answer, just hearing his ringtone made me think, “OK, you still care for me, I can’t leave you yet”, and
Smiled to know that he called.
I slept in class, because my mind was still majorly spinning and did not allow me to do any big thinking, and it probably still wouldn’t.
When I left that class, something very amazing happened just as soon as I arrived at the busstop.
Just as I sat down, when it was still raining, wet and cold, the phone rang and it was Fillipe. Even though I told him to pick me up from school on Tuesday,he still offered me to pick me up yesterday, but I kept on telling him, “we can do it tomorrow, Istill needa little more time, and I kind of miss staying here on Mondays”.
”.
After we were done talking, I was just getting ready to play a sad song on the peny-whistle, when I stop and watched. All of a sudden the rain stopped, and the sun came up.
I was completely stunned, he literally turned my rainy, cold day into a bright day full of sunshine.
I still had my mind spinning, but I can certainly feel his love more than ever now, and I am so, but so happy!
I stayed there for a few more hours, and then came back home, not stopping by his corner to see what happens.
He then called me when I just got home, and because of the tone of his voice when he said goodnight I really felt like he did love me with his whole attitude, but I was still confused because Steven called earlier and that might mean that he still loves me.
Before Stevenwent to bed he came out to say Hi to me, and I decided to play a joke on him.
He started saying that tomorrow he’ll eat a salad for lunch, with a lot of fatty stuff, and I told him, “You’ve been thinking about me weren’t you?”, and he said, “ah, maybe”,and then I told him, “Ok, you haven’t! goodnight”, and tried to shut the door, but he got in the doorway so I just hid in Cokie’s room until he said “Come here!”, in that cute voice of his, then I ran to him and he hugged me! See? I’m confused, because even though our love feels like it’s sliding away, we still have those bright little moments sometimes, and I was glad of that.
Then he went to bed and I called my mom, when I hear the other line ring again,
It was him again!
He left a message and because I had that funny feeling that it was him, I told mom I had a phonecall and called him back.
This time, when I heard him say that he really missed me and the way he told me goodnight, I felt his “Love, all around”, like that song he sang to me. IT was soaring through my veins and it made me want to dance. I told him I’ll see him tomorrow, and as soon as we finished talking, I started dancing the night away until now.
I bet we are going to have lots of fun tomorrow.
Laters
H I L, flying in the clouds again.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Sunday, April 19, 2009
He Loves me!
Tonight was my lucky night.
Before the night, I called Bianca and told her about the call I got this evening, when the neighbor told me he wanted to talk to me because he was getting attached to me, I am getting attached to him too, but I didn’t know what he meant until this morning.
Bianca, as my sisterlike friend, already knew that last night was going to be my lucky night, so she told me to shut up and get ready and hung up.
Steven also knew something was going on, and he didn’t really want to let me go, but I told him I’ll be fine.
Anyway, I got all prettied up, I dressed up like the other night, with my teardrop beets and pirls shirt underneath a sequence bordered top, and dressing pants. This time, I put a little more perfume on, and of course, jewelry.
Then I waited for the right time, 11:15 is when he told me that he’ll be home and that he was going to call me when he got here.
I had that funny feeling that tonight was going to be my lucky night too, so I danced a little before I went to see him.
When he called, I ran to meet him outside the apartment, and found out that it was him that was waiting for me. He took me to his apartment and that’s when it all started.
He played his guitar, and I played the peny-whistle, and then we were just talking to each other and he was trying to call his mom to tell her about me, when all of a sudden he got really quiet and sat very cloce to me, I smiled at him broadly.
I then asked him what was going on, and he told me what his feelings for me were, finally.
“I’ve become so attached to you”, he told me, and held me tight. Then his delicate fingers touched my lips before he finally kissed me, kissed me!, wow!
And it wasn’t just any kiss,it was a very long, deep kiss, with tongue and everything. Then he kissed my nose, my forehead, my cheeks, my hands, my belly, all over my face, and my hands and fingers again, it was truly sensational.
I kissed him back and told him that I was falling for him too, and we just sat snuggling in the couch, laughing so hard until we almost cried. When he told me he wanted to make love to me, I was shocked, and told him it was a little too soon for that, but then we started playing like little kids, sliding to the floor and up and down on each other, spilling water on each other and making each other laugh. I feel much happier with him that with Steven, I don’t know why, but when I see Fillipe I don’t want to see Steven, but I just can’t stop thinking about Fillipe all the time.
I can’t believe that he told me he dreamed about me the other night, and I told him I dreamed about him too.
It was a splendid night, and then he wanted to go to sleep and I kept him up until 4, with steven I could never do that. I fell asleep on the floor next to him, and then he went to sleep on the couch and I just stayed there, right under his hand that was caressing my hair tenderly.
I came home at about 7 even though he refused to let me go, but I told him I’ll come back and see him again, yei! He loves me.
When I came home Steven told me he was worried about me, but I told him I was fine. I haven’t told Steven anything yet, I still wonder how he’ll react if I did tell him about my “new boyfriend”, but for the moment I am left to handle both of them up until we can figure something out.
Dam!, this thing about being in love with two people really is confusing, especially if they both like me.
More updates on this next week.
Laters
H I L with 2 boyfriends.
Before the night, I called Bianca and told her about the call I got this evening, when the neighbor told me he wanted to talk to me because he was getting attached to me, I am getting attached to him too, but I didn’t know what he meant until this morning.
Bianca, as my sisterlike friend, already knew that last night was going to be my lucky night, so she told me to shut up and get ready and hung up.
Steven also knew something was going on, and he didn’t really want to let me go, but I told him I’ll be fine.
Anyway, I got all prettied up, I dressed up like the other night, with my teardrop beets and pirls shirt underneath a sequence bordered top, and dressing pants. This time, I put a little more perfume on, and of course, jewelry.
Then I waited for the right time, 11:15 is when he told me that he’ll be home and that he was going to call me when he got here.
I had that funny feeling that tonight was going to be my lucky night too, so I danced a little before I went to see him.
When he called, I ran to meet him outside the apartment, and found out that it was him that was waiting for me. He took me to his apartment and that’s when it all started.
He played his guitar, and I played the peny-whistle, and then we were just talking to each other and he was trying to call his mom to tell her about me, when all of a sudden he got really quiet and sat very cloce to me, I smiled at him broadly.
I then asked him what was going on, and he told me what his feelings for me were, finally.
“I’ve become so attached to you”, he told me, and held me tight. Then his delicate fingers touched my lips before he finally kissed me, kissed me!, wow!
And it wasn’t just any kiss,it was a very long, deep kiss, with tongue and everything. Then he kissed my nose, my forehead, my cheeks, my hands, my belly, all over my face, and my hands and fingers again, it was truly sensational.
I kissed him back and told him that I was falling for him too, and we just sat snuggling in the couch, laughing so hard until we almost cried. When he told me he wanted to make love to me, I was shocked, and told him it was a little too soon for that, but then we started playing like little kids, sliding to the floor and up and down on each other, spilling water on each other and making each other laugh. I feel much happier with him that with Steven, I don’t know why, but when I see Fillipe I don’t want to see Steven, but I just can’t stop thinking about Fillipe all the time.
I can’t believe that he told me he dreamed about me the other night, and I told him I dreamed about him too.
It was a splendid night, and then he wanted to go to sleep and I kept him up until 4, with steven I could never do that. I fell asleep on the floor next to him, and then he went to sleep on the couch and I just stayed there, right under his hand that was caressing my hair tenderly.
I came home at about 7 even though he refused to let me go, but I told him I’ll come back and see him again, yei! He loves me.
When I came home Steven told me he was worried about me, but I told him I was fine. I haven’t told Steven anything yet, I still wonder how he’ll react if I did tell him about my “new boyfriend”, but for the moment I am left to handle both of them up until we can figure something out.
Dam!, this thing about being in love with two people really is confusing, especially if they both like me.
More updates on this next week.
Laters
H I L with 2 boyfriends.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Poem of the week: A bird of Peace upon my Window
I was walking home one day,
When I heard a beautiful song,
I stopped walking right away,
And I smiled like I hadn’t for so long.
Admiring your music,
I couldn’t keep on going,
Because I had that wonderful feeling,
That something good was coming.
And it did, I met you,
And I am so glad to know,
That no matter how hard the wind may blow,
I’ve found in you,
A bird of peace upon my window.
A song of joy,
A voice of hope,
it’s what I enjoy in every note,
as I dance to the melodies you write,
I want to say,
Thank you for bringing me back light!
When I heard a beautiful song,
I stopped walking right away,
And I smiled like I hadn’t for so long.
Admiring your music,
I couldn’t keep on going,
Because I had that wonderful feeling,
That something good was coming.
And it did, I met you,
And I am so glad to know,
That no matter how hard the wind may blow,
I’ve found in you,
A bird of peace upon my window.
A song of joy,
A voice of hope,
it’s what I enjoy in every note,
as I dance to the melodies you write,
I want to say,
Thank you for bringing me back light!
Falling in Love with two people.
For the last month I have been feeling as if Fillipe is, in some way, sparkling that old flame of love that is beginning to diminish. Nonetheless, this week Steven has been trying his best to not make me cry, up until now because sooner or later I just had to let him know that this is going farther than I thought.
Today it’s been so crazy, I skipped school and I had fun, fun, fun!
First of all, Ssteven came home a little later than usual, and he wanted to show me the radio on his ipod. We were listening to music and he was singing some of those country songs we haven’t heard in a while, and making me laugh. For the moment I stopped thinking about Fillipe, and listening only to Steven, hearing him laugh and feeling him tickle me like he used to do. All was going so well until I heard Fillip playing the guitar in his balcony. I went outside with Steven and he was telling me about his new ipod, when suddenly I heard Fillipe’s guitar and then Steven himself told me I should go for it and see him. I got the peny-whistle that he gave me, which I believe, would be a good tool for me to get Fillipe’s attentions, I got my broken ocarina, because he told me he wanted to check it out, and I got the CD I made him with those recordings of my ocarina when I played it at the bus-stop or at the waterfall. I was a little doubtful about giving him the poem I wrote for him, so I stuffed it back in my backpack and left. I think I might’ve blushed if I did give it to him, so I didn’t.
I played a little bit of a Cajun song, and then he came down and took me to his balcony. We started talking, getting to know each other more and what we like, until I discovered that he was 43 years old. He then told me that people are young because of the heart, not only of age, so that must have been one of the reasons why I’m falling in love with him. I wish Steven would think that way, and the more I wish he did, the more I thinkFillipe can fill that up.
Anyway, he played me one of his favorite songs, and then he said he had to finish a work project, so he brought me back home, and then something happened, he hugged me. Hugged me! How sweet!
I danced the evening away celebrating that he hugged me, and how much I love him already.
So much was the craziness, and so wild was my dancing, that I think I hurt Steven’s feelings even though he didn’t say so.
He did give me some clues that I was hurting his feelings, and, though they were small, they were very specific and touched my heart deeper than I thought they would. For example, when I was wiggling and moving around in Cokies rocking chair and he asked me :what are you doing?, and I would say “catching some stars from the sky”, and he answered with a firmed, yet sweet, sad voice, “right, after I brought them down for you all this time”. I almost felt like crying about that, but I reassured him, “they’re still there”, but I didn’t finish my sentence, I just thought, “they just don’t shine like they used to”.
Anyway, what got me really sad is the way we talked at cokie’s room after he finished playing the game.
I did tel him I felt like I was not being loyal to him, like I was being a bad girl.
It really did hurt when he told me to stop being in love with him, to stop all this inphatuation and double talk and just be his friend, and that way I would be more loyal to him. Yes, more loyal, but sadder too. He did not understand what I meant when I told him he should tell me if he is not so sure he doesn’t mind this before it's too late, and that's when he made me cry a little, but inside, I cried a river that goes from Steven to Fillipe. What am I supposed to do? I’m in love with two people!, help!
Ah, he also told me that being in love with two people is hard, because it might happen that I might have two dates on the same day and I might not be able to choose which one to go out with. I think that now my heart got me into very serious trouble. Also, what am I going to do if I have to get out of town for a month like I did on Christmas break?, I’m gonna miss them both and that’ll be way too painful.
But after the rain comes the sun, and so after the pain comes more sunshine. I went to the room with him and he made love to me, very tenderly, in a way he hasn’t done in months. I loved the way he climed on top of me, kissed me from head to toe, and played with me before we made love. I could feel that even though he doesn’t want to admitted, he doesn’t really want me to leave, he wants me to stop this, to stop being in love with Fillipe, and all the wonders new love brought to my heart, and the only way that’ll happen, is if I stop seeing him, stop talking to him and listening to his music and let time do its duty, I could’ve done that from the beginning, but right now, it would be too dam painful and I might cry for hours. It might take me several months, if not years before my heart would stop being in love with him, and settles back only on Steven, and his boring, dreamless ways of being and living life. No way! I’m going to do what I set out to do, and take my time to get to know Fillipe better, to find out if he really is the muse and guitar player that I really need, to spark up again the flames of love in my heart.
Cokie doesn’t think I’m serious when I tell her that indeed I am in love, though being his friend is better than nothing at all.
Anyway, I’m going to dreamland and get some sleep. Later:
H I L. One for two?
Today it’s been so crazy, I skipped school and I had fun, fun, fun!
First of all, Ssteven came home a little later than usual, and he wanted to show me the radio on his ipod. We were listening to music and he was singing some of those country songs we haven’t heard in a while, and making me laugh. For the moment I stopped thinking about Fillipe, and listening only to Steven, hearing him laugh and feeling him tickle me like he used to do. All was going so well until I heard Fillip playing the guitar in his balcony. I went outside with Steven and he was telling me about his new ipod, when suddenly I heard Fillipe’s guitar and then Steven himself told me I should go for it and see him. I got the peny-whistle that he gave me, which I believe, would be a good tool for me to get Fillipe’s attentions, I got my broken ocarina, because he told me he wanted to check it out, and I got the CD I made him with those recordings of my ocarina when I played it at the bus-stop or at the waterfall. I was a little doubtful about giving him the poem I wrote for him, so I stuffed it back in my backpack and left. I think I might’ve blushed if I did give it to him, so I didn’t.
I played a little bit of a Cajun song, and then he came down and took me to his balcony. We started talking, getting to know each other more and what we like, until I discovered that he was 43 years old. He then told me that people are young because of the heart, not only of age, so that must have been one of the reasons why I’m falling in love with him. I wish Steven would think that way, and the more I wish he did, the more I thinkFillipe can fill that up.
Anyway, he played me one of his favorite songs, and then he said he had to finish a work project, so he brought me back home, and then something happened, he hugged me. Hugged me! How sweet!
I danced the evening away celebrating that he hugged me, and how much I love him already.
So much was the craziness, and so wild was my dancing, that I think I hurt Steven’s feelings even though he didn’t say so.
He did give me some clues that I was hurting his feelings, and, though they were small, they were very specific and touched my heart deeper than I thought they would. For example, when I was wiggling and moving around in Cokies rocking chair and he asked me :what are you doing?, and I would say “catching some stars from the sky”, and he answered with a firmed, yet sweet, sad voice, “right, after I brought them down for you all this time”. I almost felt like crying about that, but I reassured him, “they’re still there”, but I didn’t finish my sentence, I just thought, “they just don’t shine like they used to”.
Anyway, what got me really sad is the way we talked at cokie’s room after he finished playing the game.
I did tel him I felt like I was not being loyal to him, like I was being a bad girl.
It really did hurt when he told me to stop being in love with him, to stop all this inphatuation and double talk and just be his friend, and that way I would be more loyal to him. Yes, more loyal, but sadder too. He did not understand what I meant when I told him he should tell me if he is not so sure he doesn’t mind this before it's too late, and that's when he made me cry a little, but inside, I cried a river that goes from Steven to Fillipe. What am I supposed to do? I’m in love with two people!, help!
Ah, he also told me that being in love with two people is hard, because it might happen that I might have two dates on the same day and I might not be able to choose which one to go out with. I think that now my heart got me into very serious trouble. Also, what am I going to do if I have to get out of town for a month like I did on Christmas break?, I’m gonna miss them both and that’ll be way too painful.
But after the rain comes the sun, and so after the pain comes more sunshine. I went to the room with him and he made love to me, very tenderly, in a way he hasn’t done in months. I loved the way he climed on top of me, kissed me from head to toe, and played with me before we made love. I could feel that even though he doesn’t want to admitted, he doesn’t really want me to leave, he wants me to stop this, to stop being in love with Fillipe, and all the wonders new love brought to my heart, and the only way that’ll happen, is if I stop seeing him, stop talking to him and listening to his music and let time do its duty, I could’ve done that from the beginning, but right now, it would be too dam painful and I might cry for hours. It might take me several months, if not years before my heart would stop being in love with him, and settles back only on Steven, and his boring, dreamless ways of being and living life. No way! I’m going to do what I set out to do, and take my time to get to know Fillipe better, to find out if he really is the muse and guitar player that I really need, to spark up again the flames of love in my heart.
Cokie doesn’t think I’m serious when I tell her that indeed I am in love, though being his friend is better than nothing at all.
Anyway, I’m going to dreamland and get some sleep. Later:
H I L. One for two?
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Lines, lines, lines
Since I met Fillipe, I am back to writing and now with more enthusiasm, unbelievable! I am doing almost a poem a week!
Recently I’ve written my first poem for him: “Bird of Peace upon my Window”, and it turned out to be really good. If things keep going like this with my writing, I will probably publish a book sooner than what I thought and that will be more coolio than anything.
I am very excited about my writing, especially now.
Got to go:
More updates later.
H I L
Recently I’ve written my first poem for him: “Bird of Peace upon my Window”, and it turned out to be really good. If things keep going like this with my writing, I will probably publish a book sooner than what I thought and that will be more coolio than anything.
I am very excited about my writing, especially now.
Got to go:
More updates later.
H I L
Monday, April 13, 2009
Him?
Him?
All this week has been so crazy, I missed my appointment for the test on Monday, so I had to take it on Wednesday, and I missed Fillipe on Thursday but then we started talking on the phone more often than we normally do.
When he called me onSaturday, and after we were talking for a while, he was making me laugh so I told him that he made my day. It was incredible what happened next, he told me he was blushing!
Then he asked me if I had any plans for Sunday, I told him that Steven’s friend’s were going to come over to visit, but to our bad luck, they didn’t come. If I would’ve known, then the neighborewas going to take me somewhere for dinner.
Anyway, I spent most of Saturday on the phone with him or with Bianca, and yesterday, Terry didn’t come so Steven took me to Whichwich.
After Whichwich, however, I had this funny feeling that something good was waiting for me outside the house, so I told Steven that I wasn’t coming home yet, and stayed outside, wondering around and looking at the plants and the bushes nearby. I was looking for Fillipe, but I didn’t find him because he wasn’t home yet. Then I got lost, and somebody was trying to help me find my way home, when I heard Fillipe’s voice calling me. I told them: “Thank you but I can’t go home right now”, and took Fillipe’s hand.
He took me around the apartment and then we just sat on the porch, talking about what we like to do and stuff. He is so romantic, he has beautiful flowers sitting at the top of his balcony, he snapped a couple of candles, and then we kept talking about each other’s likes and dislikes, about our dreams, about us.
Then he played the guitar for about an hour, and then he had some project he had to do for his job so he brought me back hom.
I was almost shocked when he told me that I brought some kind of fire into his life, boy if he only knew that he brings a lot of sunshine and fire into my life as well.
I came home yesterday with a big smile on my face, and when I did, Steven was already getting ready to go to bed so we didn’t spend a lot of time together after dinner. What would we have done anyway, read his books or listen to him play his game? No way!, I needed something better than that.
Anyway, I gotta go because I have a class coming up in a few hours, but I’ll write soon.
Laters
H I L … Boys, boys, boys!
All this week has been so crazy, I missed my appointment for the test on Monday, so I had to take it on Wednesday, and I missed Fillipe on Thursday but then we started talking on the phone more often than we normally do.
When he called me onSaturday, and after we were talking for a while, he was making me laugh so I told him that he made my day. It was incredible what happened next, he told me he was blushing!
Then he asked me if I had any plans for Sunday, I told him that Steven’s friend’s were going to come over to visit, but to our bad luck, they didn’t come. If I would’ve known, then the neighborewas going to take me somewhere for dinner.
Anyway, I spent most of Saturday on the phone with him or with Bianca, and yesterday, Terry didn’t come so Steven took me to Whichwich.
After Whichwich, however, I had this funny feeling that something good was waiting for me outside the house, so I told Steven that I wasn’t coming home yet, and stayed outside, wondering around and looking at the plants and the bushes nearby. I was looking for Fillipe, but I didn’t find him because he wasn’t home yet. Then I got lost, and somebody was trying to help me find my way home, when I heard Fillipe’s voice calling me. I told them: “Thank you but I can’t go home right now”, and took Fillipe’s hand.
He took me around the apartment and then we just sat on the porch, talking about what we like to do and stuff. He is so romantic, he has beautiful flowers sitting at the top of his balcony, he snapped a couple of candles, and then we kept talking about each other’s likes and dislikes, about our dreams, about us.
Then he played the guitar for about an hour, and then he had some project he had to do for his job so he brought me back hom.
I was almost shocked when he told me that I brought some kind of fire into his life, boy if he only knew that he brings a lot of sunshine and fire into my life as well.
I came home yesterday with a big smile on my face, and when I did, Steven was already getting ready to go to bed so we didn’t spend a lot of time together after dinner. What would we have done anyway, read his books or listen to him play his game? No way!, I needed something better than that.
Anyway, I gotta go because I have a class coming up in a few hours, but I’ll write soon.
Laters
H I L … Boys, boys, boys!
Thursday, April 09, 2009
Poetry News
Last Minute news
Today I published a poem I wrote for my mom’s birthday, and I emailed it to her. It’s called:
“roses in my Mother’s Hands”. You can check it out at
www.lovingyou.com/love poems
and typing my name on the search field.
I have to translate the poem into Spanish for my mom, but I won’t be able to post the Spanish version on the site.
I am also working on writing a short story about meeting Fillipe, the guitar player that stole my heart with his music and sweetness.
You won’t have to go to a different link to go to check on my stories collection, because from what I found out from other L Y C writers, my stories would be posted right after my poems.
Please check on my site to see all my new poems, I am full at work, staying at the bus stop or sitting by the waterfall after school and writing 4 to 5 hours non-stop, I hope I can soon become a good writer!
Oh, and to my mom, I want to tell her: “happy Birthday Mami!”
Laters
H I L,
Can my fingers keep up with so much writing?
Today I published a poem I wrote for my mom’s birthday, and I emailed it to her. It’s called:
“roses in my Mother’s Hands”. You can check it out at
www.lovingyou.com/love poems
and typing my name on the search field.
I have to translate the poem into Spanish for my mom, but I won’t be able to post the Spanish version on the site.
I am also working on writing a short story about meeting Fillipe, the guitar player that stole my heart with his music and sweetness.
You won’t have to go to a different link to go to check on my stories collection, because from what I found out from other L Y C writers, my stories would be posted right after my poems.
Please check on my site to see all my new poems, I am full at work, staying at the bus stop or sitting by the waterfall after school and writing 4 to 5 hours non-stop, I hope I can soon become a good writer!
Oh, and to my mom, I want to tell her: “happy Birthday Mami!”
Laters
H I L,
Can my fingers keep up with so much writing?
Monday, April 06, 2009
Happiness and Hope
Thursday was my day to go to Houston to see my family.
I also had a very long day at school because I had to finish getting ready to go before I went to class.
The trip to Houston took a little longer than usual because they were picking up some students from U T, and I was tired and sleepy by the time I finally got there.
After talking to my family for a while and having soup with my mom, I checked my voicemail and I found a message from Fillipe.
There were 2 things that impressed me about his message.
A. He said he was thinking about me: I think about him all the time, almost as much as I think about Steven, if not more.
B. He enjoyed my company, talking to me I enjoyed being with him to, right next to him, listening to him play his music and talk to me.
I thought that was the sweetest message I’ve ever received in my entire life.I did the only thing I could do at that time,call him back.But what I’m most happy about, is the way he talked to me. He told me that I fill his life with sunshine, and that I am a very sweet person.
He fills my life with sunshine too,but unfortunately, I’m too nervous and too ashamed to tell him how I feel about him.
He’s like a sweet melody himself, and he almost got to the point where he can erase all the scars Steven left on my heart before I met Fillipe.
Anyway, after I talked to him for about half an hour and wrote some lines a little after talking to him,I unconsciously and sweetly drifted off to sleep and dreamed about him.
Next day mom took me to get a manicure, and then we went to the bank. On our way back home, we had some woman to woman talk, and we were talking about if Steven was really the one for me. She doesn’t know anything about the neighbor BTW, and I don’t plan to tell her any time soon.
On Saturday afternoon my dad took my little sister and I to the park, and then we picked my other sister up. We went to the mall and took some pictures, I stood before them as the big sister, and they were sitting down, holding my hands, I loved it!
Then my sister bought me some pretty clothes at our favorite store before going home.
Sunday was the day mom planned to take us to the beach, but I forgot that I had that test on Monday, so we only stayed at the beach for a few hours. It’s been so long since I’ve gone to the beach.
Then we went to McDonalds before they helped me catch the 3:30 bus.
I got here at about 7:30, and put my stuff away before I went to see the neighbor.
He was sweet as usual, and because it was cold outside, he was kind enough to invite me to his house.
He was playing his guitar as usual, but then he decided to do something different, and so he showed me his 7 guitars, each of them has a different sound and is used to play a different kind of music.
I was so excited to see him again, that I smiled at him and held his hand again, just likethe other day.
He was talking to me like he really did care, so he must be a caring guy, a little bit religious, but far morecreative than I thought a guy could be. He’s got that artist blood in his veins.
Anyway, the craziest thing was when I got home from the neighbor’s house, I was so excited I started dancing and singing with my music loud as I always do, and I woke Steven up.
I really thought he would be mad at me because he slammed the door when he went to the bathroom, but he didn’t. When he went out to smoke, I put everything up and go to the room. When he came in and found me there, he just smiled with that cute voice that gets cuter when he smiles at me, and said: “Welcome home honey”, then hugged me and kissed me. He pulled me cloce to him tenderly, then he put his hands around me and we began to make love, before we had a long conversation about everything, and even when I brought up our little problem that he always gets mad at me for bringing it up, he did not get mad at me. That is certainly very unusual of him, now I know why he is getting frustrated about doing things that I enjoy or finding out things we both enjoy, and I finally got the chance to try to make it clear to him, that it is not what I expect of him that counts, but that it has to come naturally.
I am so glad that he didn’t get mad when I woke him up and that makes me very happy, especially when we have a conversation like that one and we don’t end up arguing. We talked until midnight, then he had to go to bed because he has to go to work tomorrow.
He put his book on, well, I deserved it, and then I talked to Cokie for a while and told her about my trip and everything else until she went to bed.
More updates next week
H I L
I also had a very long day at school because I had to finish getting ready to go before I went to class.
The trip to Houston took a little longer than usual because they were picking up some students from U T, and I was tired and sleepy by the time I finally got there.
After talking to my family for a while and having soup with my mom, I checked my voicemail and I found a message from Fillipe.
There were 2 things that impressed me about his message.
A. He said he was thinking about me: I think about him all the time, almost as much as I think about Steven, if not more.
B. He enjoyed my company, talking to me I enjoyed being with him to, right next to him, listening to him play his music and talk to me.
I thought that was the sweetest message I’ve ever received in my entire life.I did the only thing I could do at that time,call him back.But what I’m most happy about, is the way he talked to me. He told me that I fill his life with sunshine, and that I am a very sweet person.
He fills my life with sunshine too,but unfortunately, I’m too nervous and too ashamed to tell him how I feel about him.
He’s like a sweet melody himself, and he almost got to the point where he can erase all the scars Steven left on my heart before I met Fillipe.
Anyway, after I talked to him for about half an hour and wrote some lines a little after talking to him,I unconsciously and sweetly drifted off to sleep and dreamed about him.
Next day mom took me to get a manicure, and then we went to the bank. On our way back home, we had some woman to woman talk, and we were talking about if Steven was really the one for me. She doesn’t know anything about the neighbor BTW, and I don’t plan to tell her any time soon.
On Saturday afternoon my dad took my little sister and I to the park, and then we picked my other sister up. We went to the mall and took some pictures, I stood before them as the big sister, and they were sitting down, holding my hands, I loved it!
Then my sister bought me some pretty clothes at our favorite store before going home.
Sunday was the day mom planned to take us to the beach, but I forgot that I had that test on Monday, so we only stayed at the beach for a few hours. It’s been so long since I’ve gone to the beach.
Then we went to McDonalds before they helped me catch the 3:30 bus.
I got here at about 7:30, and put my stuff away before I went to see the neighbor.
He was sweet as usual, and because it was cold outside, he was kind enough to invite me to his house.
He was playing his guitar as usual, but then he decided to do something different, and so he showed me his 7 guitars, each of them has a different sound and is used to play a different kind of music.
I was so excited to see him again, that I smiled at him and held his hand again, just likethe other day.
He was talking to me like he really did care, so he must be a caring guy, a little bit religious, but far morecreative than I thought a guy could be. He’s got that artist blood in his veins.
Anyway, the craziest thing was when I got home from the neighbor’s house, I was so excited I started dancing and singing with my music loud as I always do, and I woke Steven up.
I really thought he would be mad at me because he slammed the door when he went to the bathroom, but he didn’t. When he went out to smoke, I put everything up and go to the room. When he came in and found me there, he just smiled with that cute voice that gets cuter when he smiles at me, and said: “Welcome home honey”, then hugged me and kissed me. He pulled me cloce to him tenderly, then he put his hands around me and we began to make love, before we had a long conversation about everything, and even when I brought up our little problem that he always gets mad at me for bringing it up, he did not get mad at me. That is certainly very unusual of him, now I know why he is getting frustrated about doing things that I enjoy or finding out things we both enjoy, and I finally got the chance to try to make it clear to him, that it is not what I expect of him that counts, but that it has to come naturally.
I am so glad that he didn’t get mad when I woke him up and that makes me very happy, especially when we have a conversation like that one and we don’t end up arguing. We talked until midnight, then he had to go to bed because he has to go to work tomorrow.
He put his book on, well, I deserved it, and then I talked to Cokie for a while and told her about my trip and everything else until she went to bed.
More updates next week
H I L
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